How Torture Works

 Threaten to drill out my knees

And I’ll confirm my steamy relationship

With Nellie the Elephant

Describe each meaty impact

In lurid detail

Every startled bellow

Rendered vocally

To the very best of my abilities


Threaten to burn out my eyes

And I’ll describe my trip to Nibiru for you

How I travelled there on a passing thought

Using aborted babies as rocket fuel

And how the entrance to Planet X

Floats on a river of liberal tears

Just as you always suspected


I’ll tell you anything

So go on

Crack open the pliers

Ask me a question




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